Some deranged users on Reddit made snide remarks such as, "The fat guy should be jumping up and down that this girl is with him, let alone him possibly marrying her." And, "She's way out of his league."Instead of putting on a tantrum or playing the victim, the couple responded in a befitting manner.
Ashely and Christopher played their viral shot to fame in a calm, cool and composed manner which should win the hearts of everyone.
"Once I gave my life to Christ and saw examples of Godly marriages and relationships, I wanted that." Says Ashley.
You don’t have to state that you’re attracted to larger bodies. You talking to a fat girl, showing interest, and that says all we need to know! So if you see a fat chick you’re interested in, try to find some common ground and base conversation starters on that. There are probably things you haven’t thought about that she might be embarrassed about.
You wouldn’t message a thin girl and say ‘I think you’re hot, I’m really attracted to skinny girls’, would you? It’s important to communicate these things and make her feel that she has a safe space to express these feelings.
This is loosely based on my own experiences as well as the experiences and suggestions of many girls I’ve talked to. You probably think that it’ll make fat girls more likely to contact you first, but honestly it’s hurting your cause more than anything. *(Note, saying things like ‘real women have curves’, ‘only dogs like bones’, ‘skinny girls are gross’ are horrible things to say. It may seem silly to mention, but it actually is important. There’s no special way you need to talk to them, no different procedure, here. Different fat girls have different experiences, but we’ve all experienced a lifetime of discrimination. Be aware that there’s a whole system of oppression working against her, and it’s hard sometimes. Different girls are at different stages of comfort and acceptance of their bodies (and frankly, that goes for all girls of all shapes and sizes! There’s never going to be a one-size-fits-all list, especially when talking about such a large group of people! ) But overall it just comes down to being sensitive, perceptive, and attentive.
It makes you sound like all you care about is our bodies, that’s the most important part to you. You are more than welcome to have your preferences, but putting down other body types or other people’s preferences is NOT okay. ) Understand that some things are a little tougher for us.
I’ve thankfully been in a relationship for over two years now–I say thankfully, because it’s tough out there (well, that and I’m very much in love with my boyfriend! As fat girls, we spend a lot of our lives being treated differently–and it’s usually not in a good way. We’re just looking for you to get it and not do more of the same! Again, can’t speak for all fat girls, but lots of us have had a lot of bad experiences when it comes to dating. We get worried if your friends are going to judge us or snigger. I mentioned that most of us have had bad experiences, being the ‘secret’ lover, not ever getting to meet a guy’s friends, and it’s really quite painfully true. There are lots of folks out there who hate fat people.
) The more I talk to my friends, the more I realize that men have idea how to talk to fat girls. I realize that attraction is important and some people are attracted to fat bodies (which is totally cool! As much as it may seem counterintuitive since I’m writing a whole post on how to date a fat girl, but a lot of this can be boiled down to this simple statement: date a fat girl the same way you’d date any other girl. Men who’ll talk the good talk but won’t be seen with us in public, men who’ll have sex with us but make fun of fat girls to their friends, men who think we’re ‘desperate’ and ‘easy’ and just a quick lay. This might sound harsh, but you have no idea how many men expect some kind of reward for being attracted to fat girls. Maybe it’s not socially ‘in’ right now, but the fact of the matter is, PLENTY of guys like fat girls. We worry if your parents are going to tell you ‘you can do better.’ Any time you think it’s hard for you, remember it’s a lot harder for us. The fact that I have to add this piece of advice kind of makes me sad, but I feel it’s important. The vitriol some people have for others based purely on body size can be quite frightening. But the truth is, fat is one of those defining features that can’t really be ignored. Fat isn’t a bad thing to be, and both of you need to realize that. All galleries and links are provided by 3rd parties. HOT Black SEX Disclaimer: Busty has a zero-tolerance policy against ch*ld pornography.So I figured I’d create a handy how-to list, which will hopefully be helpful to those ready to pop on out of the fat closet, or who already have but aren’t having much success. Mentioning this first because it’s SUPER important, and it’s the first thing guys tend to mess up on. ) All that being said: weight is just something you shouldn’t mention to anyone in a first conversation, fat or thin. We’re real people with real personalities and feelings. That can be a real self-esteem killer for us, and it can make us gun shy. Just try to assure her that you’re attracted to what’s on the inside the outside! A lot of times when a fat girl is out with a guy in public, people assume that they’re ‘just friends.’ There’s such a stigma out there that fat girls never get the guy. Understand that us ladies live in a culture where every magazine, every commercial, every ad is telling us that our bodies are wrong. It’s not who a person is, but you can’t ignore it either. Your mileage may vary on any of these points, of course.This is written in a pretty heteronormative manner, which I apologize for, but the experiences I’m most familiar with are men trying to chase women. I’ve seen so many opening lines, especially on dating sites, along the lines of Here’s the thing. It makes us feel like you’re talking to us JUST for our body. You don’t need to have the username ‘bbwlover2012’, you don’t need to talk in your profile about how you’re looking for a fat girl, or how you define yourself as a chubby chaser*. So we can tend to be a little leery when a guy professes interest. If you’ve managed to stick by rule number one, you might get a question like ‘So you don’t care that I’m fat? Take her out to dinner, to the movies, walk around town. We are not represented in media except as comic relief or the ‘before’ picture in a diet ad. Chances are, there will be days when someone says something vicious and it’s hard for her to shake it off. Living in a fat bodies shapes many experiences for a person, and it’s important to understand and be sensitive to it. If she wants to call herself chunky, or curvy, or voluptuous, let her. And if you’re going to compliment her, don’t do it in a backhanded way. All girls are different, all girls want slightly different things. It’s REALLY bad to make a girl feel like you’re objectifying her straight off the bat. We can’t go into any old store in the mall and find an outfit.